Fresh Starts in Life – How Soon We Forget

My blog is officially live and I couldn’t be more happy!

Who doesn’t love that feeling of infinite inspiration and wonder that comes with something new? It’s the electricity of starting a new project, enjoying the smell of a new car, or indulging in the passionate euphoria of falling in love.

Life is filled with these moments, these fresh starts that keep us motivated to move forward in life. Sadly, these moments can also be filled with false confidence. This is what brought me to write about this bittersweet phenomena in my struggle to control Candida.

I have been trying to get a handle on my health history by tracing health-related notes and calendar entries going back in time. I am one of those people who is more efficient at processing data via visuals. I needed a way to get a birds-eye view of my overall health on a large scale. I found timeanddate.com where I could print out a calendar year on one page.

By using symbols, colors, and micro-notes I got a clear look at trends, timing, and correlations between things like face-flareups, infections, hair loss, menstrual cycles, major stress events, and being on the Candida diet.

When I think back to everything I did in 2017, my thoughts are filled with roses and the smell of kittens. It was a fabulous year, no? I had so much fun with friends and family. There were adventures and laughs. I even have pictures on Facebook to prove it.

But alas, no. The data shows otherwise.

In reality, I was a bona fide health disaster last year. Who am I kidding?! If it wasn’t one thing it was another and most of the time it was a lot of things all happening at once. How could I have forgotten about some of these major episodes?

Believe it or not our brains are wired to suppress unwanted memories. It’s how we survive. It’s how we keep faith. It’s how we move forward after getting knocked down by the inevitable challenges in life.

I am thankful that I did not dwell on my pain and suffering but I am equally grateful that I bothered to log my struggles along the way.

As evidenced by my notes, every time I recovered from a major health episode I felt like I had a fresh start on life. I felt like celebrating, clicking my heels in the air, and toasting champagne with friends. Each and every time those feelings were also followed by me immediately going back to ‘business as usual’ with healthcare and diet.

Success apparently gives me amnesia of what brought me to success in the first place.

Now I’m reveling in my current fresh start. Starting this website and blog feels so crisp and liberating, like soothing cool water washing over my eyes after a long cry. I feel I have a new lease on life and now with the world holding me accountable, how can I fail?

The better question is ‘How can I make sure I don’t fail?’ The answer is that no matter how good I feel I can’t forget the past.

Today is THE fresh start from years of fighting Candida and autoimmune challenges that I hope you will never let me forget.

 

Photo by Jonas Weckschmied